If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Send help, water and tortillas.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
