At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize