Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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