Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I wear drunk well.
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