are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Randomize
