i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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