You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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