This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
