what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me I should be a condom model.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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