He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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