So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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