OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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