So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
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