Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
