Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I am one with the molecules
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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