peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize