I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize