yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
