let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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