There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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