Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
