I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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