yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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