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just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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