24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
