The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Randomize
