oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
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