We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
