Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
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