in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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