He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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