It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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