they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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