It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize