this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Randomize
