Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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