dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
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