There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
