And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
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This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
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She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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