you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
