I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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