i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
