Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
