It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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