You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
time to smoke my breakfast
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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