school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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