Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
My first STD was from a foam party
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize