Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
It's rum buckets o'clock
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
