singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
