Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize
