When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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